I Just Can’t Make Sense Of It All

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What a week.

Samrawit dying.
Hamed being deported…

Sometimes I just don’t know what to think and how to feel. I just can’t make sense of it all. Everything seems so unfair.

On Thursday, the attack in Nice, 84 innocent people dead….

On Friday morning I woke to the sickening news that 21-year-old Hamed had been leaving desperate voicemails to our team from Gatwick airport, pleaing with Sophie, (the volunteer he has been living with) to call his solicitor. He was frantically trying to get hold of someone to tell us what was happening, but we were all asleep.

Hamed has lived through bombs being thrown through the windows of his house, his father, mother and 4-year-old sister being taken by the Taliban, life with his 12-year-old brother and 14-year-old cousin in the mud in the Calais Jungle, hunger, violence, and now this…

Despite an injunction to prevent his removal, he was illegally deported at 6am that morning.

The same day I heard of the death of a beautiful young Eritrean girl who was hit by a car in Calais, as she attempted the dangerous crossing to the UK to reach her brother in London.

On Friday evening I hear of the military coup in Turkey…

I haven’t written much this weekend because I just didn’t know where to start…

But then I got some news from Turkey… The lovely Noor had received the Ipad someone from our community donated to her to help her continue her studies which were disrupted when her university in Damascus was bombed, leaving her unable to walk.

And then I received some pictures from a friend in France. The pictures showed how many people were using the wifi we have installed for the Refugee Info Bus in the Calais Jungle, calling loved ones back home.

Then I had a phone call from my friend Mohamed who has had his asylum granted in the UK and has started a new job as a cleaner at my lovely friend’s company. He is even writing poetry again.

Then this morning I woke up and the sun was shining…

And I remembered, there is so much love in this world. There are so many miracles, so much positivity and so much beauty. That is where I will continue to focus my attention and my energy, because I know, without even the slightest doubt, that fear will never win. I know that love will always come out top.